In the process of becoming modern, we have forgotten how important it is to encourage and motivate others.
In the guise of being straightforward, have we started discouraging people?
I want to share a story that will make you question such actions.
Once Buddha and Ananda – his brother and closest associate – embarked on a journey to a village. It was almost nightfall, but they still hadn’t crossed the jungle.
Ananda saw a farmer and inquired about the village. The farmer smiled and said: “Only two miles are left. Keep walking.”
But before moving forward, Buddha looked into the farmer’s eyes and so did the farmer and both smiled. Ananda was confused but silently moved ahead. Two miles were almost over but there was no sign of the village. Ananda got impatient.
He saw more people later. All had the same reply: “Only two miles more. You’re on the right track. Go on quickly.”
But even after crossing so many miles, Ananda couldn’t see the village anywhere.
Having lost his patience, he refused to move forward.
He asked Buddha: “All these people are saying the same thing. And every time they look at you and smile. What is the matter? I can’t see the village anywhere and nothing seems funny, so why are you smiling?”
Buddha replied, “All these people are doing what I have been doing all these years.”
Ananda was shocked and couldn’t grasp the situation. He said, “It seemed like they were lying to us. But you never lied to us.”
Buddha made him understand that they weren’t lying — they were encouraging Ananda and him to cross some more distance, every time they felt tired and wanted to give up.
He shared that he had been to that village before and he knew it was not two miles further, like everybody kept saying. It was much further. But every time someone gave them a push, they were able to move ahead.
“And in our lives too, there are many such people who lie to us or say something a little differently to push us towards our destination. But there are other people too, who in the name of being straightforward, end up discouraging and demotivating people.” Dr. Shivangi Maletia
Something similar happened with me. There was a money plant in my house which was almost withered and every time a new leaf came up, it dried and fell off. But I kept watering that plant because I had faith in the small green stem.
One day when I was watering that plant, my son saw me and asked why I was watering a plant that seemed almost dead. I told him that if we keep watering it, maybe the leaves would grow back. And he started watering it.
Very soon a leaf had grown, and my son said that he’d water it even more so that it doesn’t wilt like the old leaves.
Had someone listened to me earlier, they would have thought I was lying to my son. After all, there wasn’t much left for the plant. And it’s better to tell them the truth.
But even you know the reality as much as the other person does, that is, only half. We always know our half of the truth about any circumstances. We can’t see the complete picture. And that’s why we end up giving up hope.
But when we play the role of an influencer in someone’s life — mother, friend, life partner, daughter, sister, or any role – it is crucial that we give the benefit of the doubt and become a source of hope for everyone. So, don’t ever let a chance of encouraging others go. Use your words to motivate others and not bring them down.
