Do you remember that kid from your childhood who expressed herself without fear and enjoyed every moment to the fullest?
Don’t remember? Look at the mirror and you just might.
While growing up we all tend to lose ourselves, developing into individuals with a façade that makes the world happy. But does this façade make us happy?
Unfortunately, most of us give up on the real us. In fact, as women, we are expected to play some roles, and in the process, we forget what we truly are and knowingly or unknowingly continue living up to this fake image. But sooner or later, this fake image suffocates our true selves.
This has happened to me too. Since the world sees spirituality or people who practice spirituality or meditative living as peaceful, quiet, sorted, and wise, they don’t expect them to raise their voices or question a situation.
Both personally and as a part of Queen in the Making (QITM), I try to live mindfully, preaching and practicing meditative living.
But due to this belief, I often feel pressured to live up to this image. There have been instances where I wanted to raise my voice against something that does not match my core values, but I couldn’t because I was afraid that it might tamper with my image.
I was scared to do what felt right. But that was the tipping point for me.
I believe books are great teachers and give us the right direction. So, I opened a book for guidance, and it said to me:
“People who are really spiritual, who really understand themselves, stop protecting their image. They are like a lotus that opens itself to the world without caring what will be thrown on it – water or mud. Those who don’t worry about saving their image are on the right track.” Dr.Shiavngi Maletia
This journey isn’t easy because the moment you take the first step towards breaking your image and standing up for your values, the trap of image protection will try to lure you back.
Your mind will put up questions like:
“Do I really need to take this step?” or
“Why should I give so much importance to the other person?”
But pause and find the answer to these questions. Don’t ask anybody else because they will bring their own perception. Think for yourself.
To express yourself without fear and live fully, follow these three steps:
Step 1: Is this battle worth fighting for? Or do you need to take a step back?
But before taking any action, identify your intention. Do not let your urge to maintain your image stop you from doing the needful.
Step 2: If I decide to move forward, will my interference help?
If your actions and your interference will bring about positive change, then you should definitely go ahead.
Step 3: After I take this step, some people will dislike me or not support me, what importance will those people have in my life?
This change might affect people close to you – family and friends. In that case, you can change your methods or choose a less evident way of bringing change. Doing this for your loved ones is fine because they also care about you. However, do not make these considerations for people who don’t care about you or are not even family and friends. Nothing should stop you from being yourself and following your core values.
Even if you try to live as per others’ expectations or maintain your image, ultimately you will end up hurting yourself and the people around you. So, be courageous and take these steps toward change.
After all, the earth is moving, days are changing into nights and life will go on. So, why do you want to suffocate yourself and feel awful inside? Enjoy your life and fulfill all your dreams.